Study Questions: Proverbs #10
Keeping & Being Wise Company
Proverbs 13:20 & 27:17 (CGS#10)
INTRODUCTION: Through our study of the book of Proverbs, we have come to see and hear the practical instruction that Proverbs offers. Proverbs isn’t about gaining factual knowledge for knowledge’s sake. It is about being transformed in our thinking and living through Godly wisdom. We can think of this as the work of the gospel in our lives.
What is the work of the gospel in our lives?
We can answer that question in two ways. First, vertically speaking, the work of the gospel is the restoration of our relationship with God. Secondly, horizontally speaking, the work of the gospel is expressed in renewed relationships with those around us. One of the things that we often say at Christ Community is that Christianity is not a solo sport. We need each other as we follow Jesus in a life-defining way. But relationships are hard. Tim Keller and Proverbs help us to think deeply about the role of spiritual friendship. He viewed deep, gospel-centered friendships as essential to personal and spiritual growth, reflecting the love of Christ. In his sermon Spiritual Friendship, Keller argues that friendships rooted in the gospel are not merely about companionship but about shaping one another into the likeness of Christ. He draws heavily from biblical principles, particularly John 15:13, where Jesus says, “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.”
When it comes to our relationships, our friendships in particular, we need to exercise wisdom. Let’s lean back to Keller’s note that friendships rooted in the gospel are not merely about companionship but about shaping one another into the likeness of Christ. This means that we are not looking for friendships that merely share common interests or passions, but we are looking for those who will help us follow Jesus in a life-defining way. Or, as Proverbs says, “iron sharpens iron.” Does this mean we can only have friendships that shape us into the likeness of Christ? No. In fact, Jesus was called a friend of sinners (Lk. 7:34). Of course, this title was given as an insult to Jesus by the religious leaders. However, it demonstrates that Jesus had relationships with those who were far from God. So yes, we are compelled by the gospel to be in a relationship with those who are lost and with those who will help us grow in our faith. Wisdom helps us to understand what to expect from each relationship. In other words, we can expect and experience love, support, and enjoyment from all sorts of people. However, only believing friends will truly help us be formed into the image of Jesus. This perspective requires us to be aware that all relationships are formative in some way. So, like mom used to say, “Choose your friends wisely.” It also requires us to be intentional about having a few believing friends that sharpen us as we grow in conformity with Christ. Who are those gospel friendships for you? Who is helping you grow in your relationship with the Lord? Proverbs reminds us that our friendships are important and formative. Wisdom tells us that growth never happens in isolation.
GETTING STARTED – As a group, take time to answer this question. Who was your first really good friend? Are you still friends with them?
IN THE WORD – Let’s dig back into the passage(s). It is important to strengthen our muscles in reading God’s Word. On Sunday, we walked through the passage in the sermon. Hopefully, that helped you to see the landmarks of the passage with fresh eyes. Now, with your group, go back through it and see what God is saying to you specifically.
First, before you read the passage, take a moment to ask God’s Spirit to quiet your mind and heart and to illuminate the text to you. Second, read the passage aloud to the group. Then, follow the simple method below. (O.P.A)
Observe: Make 8-10 observations from the passage. Pay close attention to observe and note repeated words and phrases, names, places, and themes.
Principles: From your list of observations, what patterns or big ideas do you see emerging? Can you distill it down into 2-4 big idea truths?
Apply: Moving from your list of principles, it is time to apply God’s Word. Remember, we believe that God’s Word is living and active and that it can change the way we live Monday- Friday. What is one tangible way to apply a truth from your list above?
Note: Another way to approach your time together is to talk through the following questions.
- What did you hear God’s Spirit say to you through the passage this week? How does it encourage you? How does it sharpen you?
- Is there an image, word, or picture that stands out to you in the passage from this week, and what about it is powerful or helpful?
- When you think about choosing your friends wisely, what are some characteristics that you look for in a wise friend?
- We aren’t going to be close or vulnerable with every person we meet. How do we distinguish between acquaintances, colleagues, and friends? How many friends can you have that you are vulnerable with? What are some healthy expectations for spiritual friendships?
- When you think about the people in your life that sharpen (disciple) you, who are they? Can you name 2-3 people who intentionally help you follow Jesus? If not, what is one intentional step to take to build a friendship like that? If so, what is an intentional thing you do in that friendship to sharpen one another?