Study Questions: Ephesians #12
The Household Ethic
Ephesians 5:22-33 (CGS#12)
INTRODUCTION: Reminder from last week – When we read and study the Bible, we need to remember that while the Bible has authority over us and speaks truth that is relevant to our daily life, we are not the original audience. That means we are going to have to work to understand imagery, sayings, and even the styles of writing so that we can ensure a correct understanding of God’s Word. Now, does that mean we all need a Master’s or a PhD to read the Bible? Absolutely not! It does mean that sometimes we need to slow down and really consider the original audience when we come to a tricky passage. Ephesians chapter 5 is one of those passages that requires us to really consider the original audience. And when we do, we will come to see truths that are truly beautiful and for our good.
In the first half of chapter 5, Paul introduced the principle of mutual submission. That is, the Ephesian believers were called to honor and serve one another. What was their motivation and example for this? Jesus. This was a beautiful reversal of what was normal and expected in their cultural context. Those who were in positions of authority (headship) were the ones to be served above everyone else. But in Jesus’ example, he is the head over everything (1:22), and yet he is the one who has served us first and foremost by giving his own life for us. This is even how Jesus expresses it. He tells the disciples that the Gentiles lord or hold authority over one another, but he came to serve and not be served (Mk. 10:45). So, the call to submission (honor) is to be seen in the gathered assembly among believers (5:21). But it also extends to the home and forms the basis of the household ethic.
When we begin reading this section, our modern sensibilities can become challenged and offended. But, what offends us in this passage is not what offended the Ephesians. So, if we are to understand the force of this section, we must look at it through Ephesian eyes. The idea that a wife would submit was the normal expectation. The expectation that a husband would love his wife in the same way that Jesus loved the church now that caught their attention! Why? Because it meant that husbands were to love and serve their wives in a sacrificial way. A totally offensive truth for their culture. And when Paul states that the husband is “head” of the wife, he alludes to the Biblical creation account, which establishes equality and dignity that is established not from man but from God. Paul, in every way in this passage, points to what we would agree to in modernity. Husbands are to love and serve their wives? Yep, we agree. Men and women have equal value, dignity, and importance in the home and society? Yep, we agree. I know these ideas don’t jump out at us, but that is because we’re not intimately familiar with the Ephesian context. These ideas most certainly jumped out to them. The part that is hard for us is if headship is not about demanding respect or your own way, how do we reconcile that Paul seems to indicate that there are different roles for men and women in this household ethic? A dance is a helpful picture. A dance, when executed with precision and effort, is beautiful and inspiring, but it takes two people, and only one can lead. The partners are equal in value and importance, and both are required for the success of the dance, but one person must set the pace and be held accountable to do so. That is what Paul is getting at here. Headship in the Bible is never about demanding or lording authority over another person. It is about serving another so that they might experience the fullness of their created purpose and their greatest good. This is a tall and noble task that Paul puts on husbands. The challenge is that we have to work out the application for our individual situations. This is why Paul doesn’t get into specifics but gives a principle. And routinely ties the principle back to Jesus. He is our plumb line and example. He has submitted to the Father and honored us. From that, we are reminded people who have been honored make it a priority to honor others. This truth applies in every season and station of life.
GETTING STARTED – As a group, take time to answer this question. What makes it hard to honor others in your daily life?
IN THE WORD – Let’s dig back into the passage(s). It is important to strengthen our muscles in reading God’s Word. On Sunday, we walked through the passage in the sermon. Hopefully, that helped you to see the landmarks of the passage with fresh eyes. Now, with your group, go back through it and see what God is saying to you specifically.
First, before you read the passage, take a moment to ask God’s Spirit to quiet your mind and heart and to illuminate the text to you. Second, read the passage aloud to the group. Then, follow the simple method below. (O.P.A)
Observe: Make 8-10 observations from the passage. Pay close attention to observe and note repeated words and phrases, names, places, and themes.
Principles: From your list of observations, what patterns or big ideas do you see emerging? Can you distill it down into 2-4 big idea truths?
Apply: Moving from your list of principles, it is time to apply God’s Word. Remember, we believe that God’s Word is living and active and that it can change the way we live Monday- Friday. What is one tangible way to apply a truth from your list above?
Note: Another way to approach your time together is to talk through the following questions.
- Paul gives them a significant kingdom reversal with the principle of submission. In many ways, this is a reversal for us, too. How does Jesus’ example and Paul’s exhortation of submission go against the grain of our culture?
- What do you think would change in your neighborhood if all your neighbors saw Christians living the way Paul has talked about in Ephesians?
- What do you think would change in our church if we lived the way Paul exhorts in Ephesians? What is holding us back, and what is your intentional next step?
- This passage speaks directly about marriage, but it applies to all of our relationships. How does the principle of submission apply to your current life context?
- How does the principle of submission impact the way you see Jesus’ life and ministry? What about his love for you?
- Paul doesn’t get rid of the idea of headship; he reframes it. How does this idea of headship impact my relationships inside the church and in my family? Again, consider the honor principle.