Repentance the path to change.
One of the common statements that comes up in premarital counseling is, “Once we’re married, it will be different.” The hard truth is actually the opposite reality. That quirky thing or a pet peeve that your finance does isn’t likely going away any time soon. Instead, what is more likely to happen is that because we’re slow to change and the irritation it brings will only be amplified in the marriage. Why? Because, often, we either have an unrealistic expectation or haven’t truly acknowledged how much it bothers us. Change is hard. But we know that, don’t we? Or at least we experience that reality every January when our resolutions don’t come to fruition simply through good intentions and desire. Again, we often find ourselves asking, why is change so hard?
Two thoughts on that question. First, it seems to me that we are only really willing to change and to do the hard work that comes with that when we experience a truly compelling picture of a better future. I.e., The reward is worth the risk. And secondly, we realize that change is going to come with ups and downs and that it is going to be a process realized in small steps, not gigantic leaps. If this is true in my physical life and relationships, why would it be any different in my spiritual life and relationship with Christ? So often, we get caught in the cycle of wishing or wanting to grow and to operate in God’s will more today than we did yesterday, but we just can’t seem to experience any breakthroughs. Don Simpson reflecting on Dallas Willard’s book, Renovation of the Heart, writes about character transformation and the importance of seeing God’s compelling picture for our future and taking it step by step. He writes,
“Beyond contentment lies intelligent, energetic participation in accomplishing God’s will in our world. We are no longer spectators but are caught up in a vivid and eternal drama in which we play an essential part. We embrace our imposed circumstances, no matter how tragic they seem, and act for the good in a power beyond ourselves. “We are reigning – exercising dominion –in life by One, Christ Jesus” (Rom. 5:17, par), looking toward an eternity of reigning with God through ages of ages (see Rev. 22:5). We take action to accomplish the will of God in his power. We are carried along by the power of the divine drama within which we live actively engaged. So, far from struggling to resist sin, we are devoted to the realization of righteousness all around us. This is the real meaning of “Yet not I, but Christ liveth in me” (Gal. 2:20 KJV). The strongest human will is always the one that is surrendered to God’s will and acts with it.
It may be that at present we cannot even imagine what it would be like for us to have a will significantly identified with God’s will. But we must never forget that he “is able to do exceedingly abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, in terms of the power that is working within us” (Eph. 3:20, par; compare Isa. 64:4). Our part is to begin as best we can.”[1]
Repentance is the action of admitting that our way isn’t the best way. Instead, God’s way is far better, and then we are to actively walk in God’s way. Regular and routine repentance is the path to change. Regular and routine repentance is how we consistently begin as best we can. Regular and routine repentance is how we let Christ live in us and cooperate with his righteousness. If we want to be faithful people in the future, let us commit to the discipline of regular and routine repentance.
[1] Don Simspon with Dallas Willard, Revolution of Character – Discovering Christ’s Pattern for Spiritual Transformation (2005), 123-124.